We all live in relationships with other people. Some relationships are between symmetric peers with equal power. Some relationships are between unequal people with asymmetric power at different ends of the power spectrum. In Bible times, the most powerful people were masters and the least powerful were slaves. Now, we often call a powerful person: president, chief, employer, leader, supervisor, manager, boss, teacher, admiral, captain, general, doctor, etc. We often call a less powerful person: follower, worker, employee, intern, underling, soldier, sailor, student, etc. God saw fit to provide instructions about how these people should live godly lives with each other…
Slaves, obey your earthly masters with deep respect and fear. Serve them sincerely as you would serve Christ. Try to please them all the time, not just when they are watching you. As slaves of Christ, do the will of God with all your heart. Work with enthusiasm, as though you were working for the Lord rather than for people. Remember that the Lord will reward each one of us for the good we do, whether we are slaves or free.
Masters, treat your slaves in the same way. Don’t threaten them; remember, you both have the same Master in heaven, and he has no favorites. (Ephesians 6:5-9
Servants, obey in all things those who are your masters according to the flesh, not just when they are looking, as men pleasers, but in singleness of heart, fearing God. And whatever you do, work heartily, as for the Lord, and not for men, knowing that from the Lord you will receive the reward of the inheritance; for you serve the Lord Christ. But he who does wrong will receive again for the wrong that he has done, and there is no partiality. Colossians 3:22-25 WEB)
Let as many as are bondservants under the yoke count their own masters worthy of all honor, that the name of God and the doctrine not be blasphemed. Those who have believing masters, let them not despise them, because they are brothers, but rather let them serve them, because those who partake of the benefit are believing and beloved. Teach and exhort these things. (1 Timothy 6:1-2 WEB)
Servants, be in subjection to your masters with all fear; not only to the good and gentle [1933 epieikḗs], but also to the froward [4646 skoliós]. For this is acceptable, if for conscience toward God a man endureth griefs, suffering wrongfully. For what glory is it, if, when ye sin, and are buffeted for it , ye shall take it patiently? but if, when ye do well, and suffer for it , ye shall take it patiently, this is acceptable with God. (1 Peter 2:18-20)
Even the highest and most powerful people report to someone or have someone over them. And, even the lowest and least powerful people are responsible for someone and affect someone. So what does the Bible mean by classifying the powerful people as either “good and gentle” or “froward”?
- GENTLE -: 1933 epieikḗs
- properly, equitable; “gentle” in the sense of truly fair by relaxing overly strict standards in order to keep the “spirit of the law.” (“justice beyond ordinary justice”) builds on the real intent (purpose) of what is really at stake – and hence, is true equity that appropriately fulfills the spirit (not just the letter) of the law.
- FROWARD -: 4646 skoliós
- properly, crooked (bent) because dried out (like a piece of parched wood); (figuratively) morally twisted (warped) because lacking the oil of the Holy Spirit – hence, unacceptable to God (His standards); “perverse, unjust” — from which we get our modern scoliosis -: an abnormal lateral curvature of the spine.
Here are some attributes of both kinds of people…
Good and Gentle
- tender, kind, easy, mild
- considerate and reasonable
- not disposed to be too stern
- gracious, forgiving, merciful
- pleased with reasonable service
- indulgent towards errors
- gives appropriate punishment
It is a blessing to be around a good and gentle person. It is a pleasure to work with a good and gentle person. Everybody benefits from the grace of a good and gentle person.
Froward and Perverse
- unreasonably exacting
- severe, rigorous
- angry without cause
- yells and speaks harshly
- requires arduous labor
- doesn’t pay full wages
- gives unbearable punishment
It is difficult to be around a froward person. It is painful to work with a froward person. Everybody else must use grace in order to tolerate a froward person.
Which one are you? Often, we can’t see ourselves as accurately as others see us. If you really want to know which one you are, and if you are brave enough to really find out, print out those lists and ask those people near you. If you find that you are more “froward” than you want to be, there is an answer found in the word of God…
Since you have heard about Jesus and have learned the truth that comes from him, throw off your old sinful nature and your former way of life, which is corrupted by lust and deception. Instead, let the Spirit renew your thoughts and attitudes. Put on your new nature, created to be like God—truly righteous and holy. (Ephesians 4:21-24)
We know that our old sinful selves were crucified with Christ so that sin might lose its power in our lives. We are no longer slaves to sin. For when we died with Christ we were set free from the power of sin. (Romans 6:6-7)
This means that anyone who belongs to Christ has become a new person. The old life is gone; a new life has begun! (2 Corinthians 5:17)
Christian employees are better than slaves. Every boss should read The Letter to Philemon. It is about a useless slave named Onesimus who ran away. Now, he is returning to his owner because of his salvation. Consider this beautiful appeal on behalf of the Apostle Paul about your most useless employee…
Therefore, though I have all boldness in Christ to command you that which is appropriate, yet for love’s sake I rather beg, being such a one as Paul, the aged, but also a prisoner of Jesus Christ. (Philemon 1:8-9 WEB)
I beg you for my child, whom I have become the father of in my chains, Onesimus, who once was useless to you, but now is useful to you and to me. I am sending him back. Therefore receive him, that is, my own heart, whom I desired to keep with me, that on your behalf he might serve me in my chains for the Good News. But I was willing to do nothing without your consent, that your goodness would not be as of necessity, but of free will. For perhaps he was therefore separated from you for a while, that you would have him forever, no longer as a slave, but more than a slave, a beloved brother, especially to me, but how much rather to you, both in the flesh and in the Lord. (Philemon 1:10-16 WEB)
If then you count me a partner, receive him as you would receive me. But if he has wronged you at all, or owes you anything, put that to my account. I, Paul, write this with my own hand: I will repay it (not to mention to you that you owe to me even your own self besides). Yes, brother, let me have joy from you in the Lord. Refresh my heart in the Lord. (Philemon 1:17-20 WEB)
Having confidence in your obedience, I write to you, knowing that you will do even beyond what I say. (Philemon 1:21 WEB)
Remember…
The wise are known for their understanding,
and pleasant words are persuasive.
Discretion is a life-giving fountain to those who possess it,
but discipline is wasted on fools.
From a wise mind comes wise speech;
the words of the wise are persuasive.
Kind words are like honey—
sweet to the soul and healthy for the body. (Proverbs 16:21-24)
For deeper study:
7 horrible ways to lead a team (and the 1 mistake everyone makes) Don’t fall into the trap of doing any of the following, simply because you have a position of power — especially this first one: